Bitter Gram hopes for AFL return

Former AFL Saints player, Jason Gram. Picture: Tony Gough Source: Herald Sun

JASON Gram has spent a long and frustrating summer doing everything in his power to move on.

The sacked St Kilda star holidayed in America, Fiji and Thailand, won a financial settlement from the Saints, and signed to play country footy with North Albury.

His body feels better than it has in 11 years, he works out daily with his personal trainer, and he still holds out hope of an AFL career.

But as much as he tries to put his October sacking in the past, it keeps dragging him back.

Already on probation at St Kilda as the fallout from a personal relationship turned messy, he was sacked on October 30 after authorities became involved.

Yet while Gram acknowledges he made mistakes, he says it is time to set the record straight.

Four months on, he tells the Herald Sun he is tired of the whispering campaign painting him as an arch-villain and repeat offender on a grand scale.

"I am really upset with some of the things that have been said towards me, calling me certain things which are far from the truth," Gram said.

"Sometimes I go down the street or am at a club or a bar, and someone yells out to me across the room.

"It's unbelievable what they say. It upsets me someone would think that and say that. It is Chinese whispers. It is just full-blown lies. It is disappointing but the people who know the truth are my family and friends."

Jason Gram. Picture: Wayne Ludbey

Gram still cannot fathom how quickly he was thrown on to the football scrapheap.

His last two games were among his best - so much so the player who once lost a Norm Smith Medal on countback polled a Brownlow Medal vote in his last game at St Kilda.

Suspended by the club on September 6 last year, another incident requiring authorities saw them act swiftly.

He says he was blindsided by St Kilda's action, even as he acknowledges he was warned about what St Kilda labelled, "failure to honour repeated undertakings to the club about his behaviour".

"It's not like I killed anyone, it's not like I bashed anyone. It was a private matter - there was a fight between myself and another person.

"I had some personal issues but I don't think the club needed to jump on board and sack me. They gave me warnings but I still don't believe they needed to sack me. I think it was a private matter and I don't think it was worthy of me getting the a-- over. I am shattered that my football career ended like that. I spent nine years at St Kilda. I barracked for St Kilda as a kid, and I love the St Kilda football club, but there are a few things I don't love there.

"They say they gave me some help and maybe they did, but it was a personal issue that I was going through and it was only going to take a few more weeks or a month to get over it.

"St Kilda have had a few issues in the past so they felt they might need to jump on me, but other clubs I have spoken to said they wouldn't have done that."

The Saints have said privately they could not have been more adamant about Gram's need to lift his standards.

He had been counselled by coach Scott Watters mid-year, told again he was on his last warning, and was still officially suspended from the club when his last indiscretion occurred.

That issue saw St Kilda's head of football Chris Pelchen and list manager Ameet Bains summon Gram to a meeting at his manager Tom Petroro's offices on the night of October 30.

"They sat us down and they said they had to terminate my contract," Gram said.

"I walked straight out. I was too upset to hear the rest. I sat in another room for 45 minutes and waited for it to be finished. I haven't spoken to the coaches or hierarchy since. I still love all the boys and catch up with them, so I am always going to be mates with them."

He acknowledges an element of blame.

"I am just disappointed with myself and a little bit angry at myself, and a little bit angry with the Saints for what they have done, but there is nothing that can be done about it.

"I kick myself now when I think about it. If I had let it all go back then, I would still be on the list, and still training with the Saints at the moment. It's just disappointing St Kilda went down the path of sacking me. I still believe I am in their best 18."

Gram spoke with several AFL clubs after his sacking but in the days before the national draft made the decision not to nominate, deciding he needed to step away from AFL football.

His link with new North Albury coach Jason Akermanis through their time together at Brisbane saw him choose the Ovens & Murray club over 30 others who contacted him.

He is determined not to become one of those ageing ex-AFL players who talk about another chance but never act on it.

"I still believe I should be playing AFL, so I will play to an AFL standard. It might be a bit slower, but I won't slack off. I will do everything I can to give it one last crack and if it doesn't work out I will go on to the next chapter," he said.

"The (settlement) was all sorted out last year. I took a bit of a hit but that was always going to happen. We agreed on a figure and it's been signed off on. I don't think I have felt as good as this in a long time.

"I will be getting out of Melbourne and the club have given me a house from Thursday to Sunday, and it's a great town. During the week I will come back to Melbourne and work out and train.

"I believe I have got plenty of good footy left. I have been training like a dog and keeping fit and doing what I can. Fingers crossed something might happen. If not, I am not going to cry about it."

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